Because I'm white, I sit here quietly and don't have an opinion

So this isn't exactly news because it isn't referencing a published source, but is something that has come to my mind regarding diversity and the College of Education.

Oftentimes something related to diversity is brought up in other classes, anything from cross-cultural sensitivity/competence, access to higher ed, using historical contexts to draw conclusions to current issues, etc., and often the conversation ends the same: the system is flawed, and as informed and aware scholars/practitioners, we move the needle when, where, and how we can.  I am all for increased conversation and engaging dialogue around these issues.  Professionally I want to continue to work for increased access and completion for underrepresented populations.  I'm obtaining a degree to be a practitioner, and I chose this institution for a variety of reasons, one of which being the diversity of our faculty. What has continually surprised and shocked me is vitriol from other students. A conversation in another class earlier this week left me bewildered and both personally and professionally confused, and these were some of the comments that ended up on social media regarding a debate that had something to do with international politics and classism and righting the wrongs of the system.

"them privileged folk was all for a classless society til I talked about dismantling capitalism and white supremacy"

"Naw, that ain't even it. Did you hear the "there are only so many top jobs" comment?"

"I was in my seat mad as **** the whole second half of class. heart beating fast. like...do y'all not know how sick y'all are?"

And this is where I slowly lose my mind as I try to navigate the constant minefield of awareness, advocacy, inclusion, and engagement, because no matter what, I feel as though what is communicated to me is: "as a white (privileged) person, your existence perpetuates these problems."  I doubt my own ability to form innocuous comments and questions.  At certain engagements with people outside of our program (like my family), I've learned to talk differently about what it is that I do, because so often my audience does not hold the same ideals and there's only so much of being attacked one can take over holiday dinner; the best illustration I can think of for this is how in my first year as a college adviser, one of my best students, a low-SES, first-gen, African-American male was admitted to UIUC, and he texted me as soon as he heard the news and I cried because I was so happy to see him accomplish something he never thought he would. That same day, my brother, a white male with a low GPA but a higher ACT score, was denied admission to UIUC, and try as I might explain why my student was admitted over my brother, it just made everyone else mad.  Now, in graduate school, I feel again unable to contribute to or participate in some of these conversations because my opinions or experiences aren't welcome, and I am part of the problem, not the solution. I've had it communicated that I'm practically a saint for wanting to help "poor minority kids" from one side and accused of using altruism stemming from my privilege to want to make amends to people who don't need help.

I just want to work with students, understand how and why we got to where we are, and do what I can to help others succeed. Where, as a scholar, am I allowed to have an opinion, and when, as a professional and practitioner, can I bow out of the conversation without making it seem not to be about my feelings being hurt, but because I'm politely disengaging from communication that I don't see to be serving me or my students?